Ironically I Thank You

Sometimes i sit
And i think about you
I think about all the things
We used to do
Sometimes i sit and I think
About what
Could of been
But if it had been
I would never be

I thank you for that
For the pain
For the late night tears
For the never ending fears
From before

You have helped shape who i am
You have helped make
Me stronger
Than I ever thought…
Imagined
I could be

I sit and i think about the
Happy times
They were few
But not rare
I sit and i think
About all the bad times
So solid
They were always there

But i do remember your smile
How you would smile
And say the worst of me
So bright
With words so grim
I would sit and wonder
Jut ponder that smile
You would kiss me
So sweet
Could this really be him?

I sit and i wonder
It seems
Ive sat too long
You been my inspiration for years
Ive even written you a song
Which i recite to no one
No one at all
For I always sang it to myself
Whenever you made me fall

So now i find myself
Sitting no longer
No more so i crouch among the grass
No more do i hide my words
No more do i walk along in shame
For that time for me is past

Ironically I thank you
For without you
I would still be weak
I would still be vulnerable
And it would still be you
That I’d seek

Ironically I thank you
For the many ways
You made me feel
Without you
I would still be numb
I would be dumb
To what it really means
To be real-

True love will find me one day
Ironically for that
I thank you…